Classic College Procrastination

I know you are all anxiously anticipating a blurb about the gallons of wisdom gained from my trombone students... I simply can't wait to spill it out to you...but this post is not going to be about that. Surprise.

As we come pummeling towards the end of the semester, I thought I'd share bits of wisdom gathered from- not necessarily those that I've been teaching- but basically anymore around me, or any situation I find myself in.
Go-Go Gadget: End of Semester
Methinks a list form is best.

• No matter how much work you do throughout the semester, the last two weeks will always, ALWAYS make you feel like you should have prepared yourself better. Just disregard that feeling because you will never, NEVER feel prepared for what you get smacked with right before those glorious weeks off in December.

• You will start to questions tasks that used to seem simple. For instance, "Why am I hole punching every lesson plan I've ever written and putting them into a binder?" Or "Why must I brush my hair?" or "My sheets seem clean... must I wash them?" or "These noodles are really taking their time in this bubbly water, I just won't eat tonight." You start to prioritize. "I will practice until I get kicked out of the music building, then I will hide under a desk in the total darkness until the security leaves...then I will practice until dawn...then I will buy all of the coffee at Dunks..."

• Which brings me to another thing that happens... your brain starts to implode. This is a bad time to go in to be evaluated for ADHD. They will absolutely diagnose you inaccurately during this time because yes, you might as well have ADHD. Your train of thought might be something like the following:

"Golly, these noodles are taking a long time to cook. I wonder if I should throw them at the wall. That's spaghetti, right? But...if it sticks is it done or does that mean it needs to bubble longer? This steam is so warm, I'd love to dive right in, this house is awful. I wonder how much heat is going to cost. I haven't purchased any Christmas presents, do I really like anyone enough to give them a present anyway? What is it about all of these people that is driving me crazy right now? I want to gauge out the eyes of the security guard who kicked me out of the music building last night. Like Oedipus. I should reread some Greek drama. I don't read enough anymore. Reading. Reading music, music...do I even like music? Should I have been a business man? Man?" And to quote Gilmore Girls, you'd end up with, "No, I make a fine woman. Monkey, Monkey, Underpants."

You can see how detrimental this can be to one's productivity. 

• Beyond the lengths of your "To Do" List, there's always the self-deprecation that begins right around this time... "Why don't I have a mate?" "Why does my hair poke out here and there?" "Why isn't my ten year old brother my best friend?"

BUT WHAT YOU MUST REALIZE...

Is that it's all nonsense. Just get through these bloody weeks, and you'll be back to normal. Don't make commitments to people, don't put anything in writing...you just can't be held accountable for your actions during these trying times.

I AM BORED EVEN WRITING THIS BUT I'M ALSO NOT BORED BUT NOW I NEED TO GO DO WORK SO I WANT TO STAY HERE BUT THAT SEEMS LIKE WORK BUT I'M COLD BLAST THIS HOUSE WHERE ARE THE NOODLES, MONKEY, MONKEY, UNDERPANTS.